I know I’ve been a bit quiet. I have an explanation — there was an unexpected death in my extended family this week.
It’s one of those kind of things that just unfortunately happens, usually with no warning, causing you to think about your own approaching mortality, and making you wonder if you’re doing enough, not doing enough, could be doing more, etc. You know how those thoughts roll — on and on like a broken record, driving you crazy. You cry, you reminisce, you put your energy into everything and nothing all at once…Yeah, death is quite the fiend…I hate the way he creeps in and steals, destroys, snatches someone with vigor and unapology.
This will probably be one of the few times I’ll wax religious, but I don’t know how people handle the thought of death without belief in God, without hope for a future reunion. It’s what kept me sane when I miscarried my two babies, or lost two beloved grandparents, or other family and friends…What do you have if you have no hope?? My personal belief is that I serve a living, loving, righteous and redeeming God who allows us the hope of eternal life. If you are curious, please leave a comment so I can message you. Otherwise, no personal attacks please. After all, I am grieving and trying to process…In my own way, this is part of how I cope.
So today, while I’m sitting at home with my children as the funeral is being held in another state, I am trying to think about several things…The memories I have of the person who has passed away, the memories I still have time to make for myself and my family and friends (God willing), and the things I cherish and enjoy about my own life now, such as it is.
Don’t wait to say the things that need to be said or spend the time that needs to be spent. Life is fragile and fleeting.
I’m sorry for your loss. I hope you find peace in whatever way is meaningful to you.
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